I think my readers will be interested to hear my story for it is an unusual one. It is the story of the gradual degradation of a man of considerable intelligence.

I was first married to Julie Henson, an attractive dark-haired Welsh girl and for the first year or two of our marriage I was fairly happy. And then I found out that Julie was having an affair with another woman.

I have no objection to lesbianism and if my wife had simply been bisexual things might have worked out. But she spent the whole of her time with her new lover and completely rejected me. I didn't see how, our marriage could continue on such a basis.

It was then that I met Victoria. She was an extremely well­connected as well as talented young woman, and not the sort to slip into bed at the drop of a hat. I had taken her out to dinner five or six times before I even got as far as kissing her.

And then one night we ran into my wife with her lesbian friend. My wife and I were still living together and it so happened that Victoria lived in the same part of Kensington as we did. Atthe end of the evening, when Julie's friend had to leave, my wife, Victoria and I joined forces and shared a taxi together to Kensington. What I didn't realize straightaway was that my wife was extremely taken with Victoria.

The next few days found Julie behaving very well as far as the domestic side of our life was concerned. She was most attentive and helpful. It wasn't until she began to ask about Victoria that it began to dawn on me that she was interested in her.

'She's not a lesbian like your friend Hilda,' I said somewhat brutally. 'That's what you think,' said Julie. 'How do you mean?' I was slightly alarmed at the certitude with which she had spoken.

'I mean what I say. I always know a lesbian when I see one. Victoria's definitely that way, even though she may go out with men,' replied Julie.

'I don't think so,' I said. But I worried because I really cared for Victoria and although she was not in any way committed to me I could see that she liked me and that there was a strong probability that things would work out in my favour if I was patient enough. but this was a complication - that's if Julie was right, and I had to find out.

'I'm sure you're wrong,' I said, 'but I'll tell you what. We'll put it to the test. I'm so sure of myself that I'll ask her round here and you'll say that I've been delayed. She knows we're breaking up so she won't object to being frank about her relationship with me. Then you can see whether she responds to you in any way. I'll sit in the small annex to the library.'

'Okay,' said Julie, 'it's a deal.'

Three days later I sat in the small annex with the door very slightly ajar listening to the conversation between my wife and Victoria.

It was pretty perfunctory at first but after they'd had a few drinks they became a bit more free in what they talked about.

'I'm leaving Geoffrey for a woman,' said Julie. 'I don't know whether he told you.,

'Well, he hinted at something of the sort,' said Victoria. 

There was a silence in the room and when I put my head round the corner of the door I saw Julie reach out to take Victoria's hand. They were sitting side by side on the sofa. Naturally I expected Victoria to withdraw her hand almost at once, but the strange thing was that she didn't. The two girls simply sat there holding hands.

And then, to my utter astonishment, Julie put her head against Victoria's breasts, snuggling against her, while Victoria put an arm round her. I could not believe my eyes.

They sat like that for a few minutes and then Julie said that I would be back very shortly. 'Could I see you sometime at your flat?' she asked Victoria.

'Yes, I'll give you my phone number,' was Victoria's reply.

When I eventually came out of the annex Victoria and Julia had gone to the kitchen together to prepare supper. I entered the kitchen as if I had just come home, exchanging glances with Julie whose face looked triumphant. Victoria was most affable and after another drink or two we all sat down to an aubergine dish at which my wifewas something of an expert. After dinner Julia said she had to go out for a while and Victoria and I were left alone.

Victoria behaved as if nothing had happened but I was determined to find an explanation. 1 spoke quite directly.

'You know that Julie's something of a lesbian. Well, as we are getting more and more friendly and it had occurred to me that you might be willing to come and live with me - I was going to ask you the other night but I didn't get a chance - I just want to ask you one thing. I know it sounds silly to ask such a thing, but it's really important to me. Have you any lesbian leanings?'

It sounded a bit crude but I just had to find out about her. I couldn't risk another failed relationship.

'It depends what you mean,' said Victoria. 'No woman is entirely, hetero­sexual. It mostly depends on the man or men around a woman, at least it does in many cases. I can't say categorically that I never think about women.'

'But you prefer men?'

'Yes, in many ways. But it isn't quite as simple as that, you know. When a woman has a choice between a man and a woman a lot depends on the way the man satisfies her. Women are not always looking for the obvious.'

I was mystified by the cryptic way she spoke and I felt an inner shiver of fear that I might lose out to Julie, and that Victoria and she might get together. I wanted Victoria more than anything in the world.

'Do you understand?' she asked me after a pause.

'No, not precisely,' I admitted, 'but I'll try to.'

'Well,' she said, 'I think I could tell you more tomorrow if you came round to my flat. I'm not particularly in the mood tonight to be serious.'

I eagerly looked forward to the following night and arrived punctually at Victoria's flat.

I was surprised to see that she was wearing long black gloves, a tight­fitting black basque, and a pair of long, shiny black boots that reached to the top of her hips. Even more astonished that she wasn't wearing a bra.

'Come in,' she said with a smile. 'I can see that you are surprised at the way I am receiving you, but I dress like this to please myself. It goes along with what I call my persona. You know, I'm not really the conventional, simpering kind of girl.'

I hadn't altogether understood. Anyway I liked the outlandish outfit she was wearing. For one thing I had never seen her naked breasts before, and the smooth, sheathing boots gave me a wonderful idea of her legs and the shapeliness of her buttocks. What I didn't realize was that the outfit she wore was symbolic of a kind of masculine trait in her make-up - as I was soon to learn.

I was even more amazed when she told me that she wanted me to undress. 'Undress?' I didn't mean to query her request but I was so amazed that I repeated the word after her almost as if I did. Of course I was only too pleased to: I had longed for sex with her for two or three weeks and here she was taking the initiative, telling me to get my clothes off. I could hardly believe my good fortune. Perhaps this was the answer to my query about her lesbianism: she was going to demonstrate that I was barking up the wrong tree!

I quickly took off my clothes when we reached the lavishly furnished lounge and then, slightly embarrassed, sat down in a chair, waiting for her to return from her bedroom. My back was towards the door and I didn't hear her come in. But suddenly I felt her presence just behind me and then, to my utter amazement and bewilder­ment, she put a metal collar round my neck and snapped it home. A second later she held a riding crop against my chin, forcing my head back.

'What's this?' I expostulated.

'Keep still,' she advised me. 'You wanted to learn about me and I have asked you round to answer your questions.'

Her tone had become brusque and I began to worry about what she was up to. I couldn't imagine why it was necessary for her to restrain and threaten me in this way, for it seemed to me that the way she held the riding-crop was distinctly threatening.

'Now,' she began, 'instead of a direct explanation I am going to let you find out for yourself where I stand and what I need in a man or woman. You are a free agent and if you want me to I will unlock the collar I have put round your neck and you may go. If you go, you go for ever and that is the end of our relationship. If yous stay, I expect you to use your high intelligence and your powerful imagination. A lot will depend on what happens and how you react to what happens in the next half hour or so.'

I had never heard such things in my life. She seemed to speak in riddles and I was at a loss. But what I was sure about was that if just having a collar round my neck was the price I had to pay to find out about her, then I would accept it. The last thing I wanted at that moment was to go out of her life, to see ac end to our relationship.

'I will stay,' I said.

'Right,' she said. 'I have changed into a bra and panties and I want you to do obeisance to my panties before we go any further.' She came round to the front of the chair holding the riding crop. I could see that she now wore a black bra and a matching pair of panties. They were attractive and made the most of her fine bottom. But I couldn't quite understand what she meant about obeisance to her panties.

But I got to my feet and kissed the front of her panties. That seeming to me the appropriate gesture.

When I lifted my head up she said: 'Is

that all?' I knew that 1 had failed her so far and the only thing I could think of was that I should get on my knees and kiss the panties properly, keeping up my kisses for some time. It had dawned on me that she wanted a demonstration of my regard for women, and her panties were in some way symbolic of womanhood. I smiled, bent down and started to kiss the front of her panties. It was the nearest I'd ever got to her genitals and I found it erotically provocative.

But then I got carried away. I started to lick the panties and then, losing my self-control, so excited was I at the thought of being so intimate with Victoria, I suddenly pushed the panties aside and put my tongue into her slit.

She drew back immediately and _looked at me scornfully.

'So that is how you show your respect for womanhood. Then is it a surprise to you that I am sceptical about men? That I often think women are better partners? Unless you can behave better and show your proper under­standing of a real woman I might develop a relationship with Julie. It would be far more fruitful than this.'

I was shocked at what she said. I knew I had been wrong to put my tongue to her vulva, but she was now threatening to have an affair with Julie, an affair excluding me. Somehow I had to made amends before it was too late.

'I am sorry,' I began. 'I am beginning to understand ... I, er . . .'.

She interrupted me. 'Never mind about being sorry. You've got some time left and you'd better make the most of it. but first you'll wear some restraining garments. She pointed to some things she had brought back when she came from the bedroom. 'Put them on,' she said.

She was speaking in a more commanding manner than before and I didn't dare to start arguing. I simply put on the clothes, consisting of a kind of short vest that at once restricted my ease of movement, then some long black gloves that stopped me touching her skin, and last of all -with Victoria's help - a kind of bag for my penis, chained to my waist and quickly locked in position by Victoria.

'That's better,' she said. 'If you can't restrain your lust, then garments of this kind are necessary. But, of course, it is far better if a man learns to discipline himself without such aids.' She paused. 'Yes, discipline is the essence of it. Your only chance with me is through discipline and I'll start you off with some. Please lie over that chair.'

I looked round at the chair and not quite knowing what she intended I placed myself face down over the chair

as she had requested. I couldn't imagine what she had in mind until I was suddenly brought up sharply by a stroke from the riding-crop over my buttocks.

'What the hell are you doing?' I demanded.

'Do you want to be free and go? Quickly, make up your mind,' she said. I had no choice. I stayed where I was and submitted to a whipping . . . . Unbelievable, yes. but that's what I did. It was all over before I really grasped the full implications of what she was doing to me.

A day or two before I had thought of her as the perfect female, the wife of my dreams, but I had rapidly come up against reality. She was not going to fit into the cosy pattern. If I wanted her still, it had to be on her terms, and so far as I could see at that point they were very special, almost bizarre terms into the bargain.

Nevertheless I loved her and I was ready to go to some considerable lengths to please her. I imagined that she had one or two idiosycratic ideas and she thought this was a way of finding out about a man. I also had a glimmer of an idea that she was critical of the way men took her sex for granted. It followed from this that she could turn to a lesbian relationship if she found men disappointed her. I was determined not to disappoint her.

'You have paid the penalty of taking advantage of my letting you kiss my panties. I am going to give you yet another chance to show that you respect a woman's most intimate.

garment. A man should be able to do that without losing control. Indeed, in my view he should be ready to accept the privilege of kissing a woman's panties or knickers as a substitute for sexual intercourse. A woman does not always want intercourse just to suit the man. I think you will - if you have any imagination - come to agree with me.'

I wanted to say that I could never accept panties in lieu of sex, but she didn't give me time to interrupt.

'In a few minutes I have a friend coming. She's only seventeen and I shall give you yet another opportunity to show your worth. She enjoys the admiration of men, provided they keep their place and she insisted on her panties being worshipped before she'll have the slightest thing to do with a man. Now is your opportunity.'

Another girl? What was this? I was at a loss. But if it would please Victoria to demonstrate that I could kiss another girl's panties without falling for her I would do so.

'You realize that it is your last chance,' she said.

The door-bell rang and a moment later a tall, extremely attractive girl came into the room. She was staggeringly pretty and my heart leapt. Was this the one whose panties I was going to have to lick?

The girl nodded and then went into an adjoining room.

'She's gone to get ready for you. Now we'll take everything off you. She wants you nude.'

Astonishingly I found myself alone with the girl a few minutes later in the adjoining room. I was amazed to see how beautiful she was, especially in the special outfit she had apparently put on for my benefit, if I could call it that. She wore only a pair of fish-net stockings and a deep body-belt with pantie attachment, apart from gloves and short boots. I was also staggered to see a pair of stocks at one side of the room, but at the time I did not think they could be more than one of Victoria's foibles for I knew she collected old weapons and the like.

The girl, whose name was Phoebe, told me to crawl across the floor to her. When I half got to my feet she said in a commanding voice that brooked no argument: 'Crawl!'

When I reached her she told me to lick her panties in the V of her thighs. They were so thin that I could see the outline of her outer lips and the hairy tresses of her pubic hair.

I started to lick the flimsy material, soon wetting it so much that the wafer-thin panties seemed to offer no protection for her genital area. If she wanted me to go so far, then surely she really hoped that I would somehow push the crotch-piece of the panties a little to one side and tongue her directly.

I began to use my tongue to push the knickers aside for I was now filled with overpowering lust for her lovely body and especially for sex. I almost forgot about Victoria, such was the roused state I was in, my prick rampant and jutting aggressively from my pubichair.

In a moment I had got the crotch to one side and my tongue thrust into her vulva.

It was then that the riding-crop that she had been holding behind her came down on my back. 'Continue to lick me,' she said.

I wasn't sure what it was all about. she was hitting me hard with the crop, bringing it down fiercely over my shoulders and back, but simul­taneously urging me to lick her. 'Push it right in,' she shouted. 'You must tongue-fuck me.'

It was the most extraordinary few minutes of my life for I was simultan­eously enjoying the wonderful sensation of tonguing her trim, unsullied vulva and titillating her little clitoris, while at the same time under­going really severe punishment at her hands.

Which would win, I thought to myself, my urge for her sex or the pain of the whipping? and then, almost imperceptibly, I found myself enjoying the agony of the whipping, getting a kick from it. It was only after'that that I was able to interpret my action as in performing for her, and taking a whipping at the same time, as a deeply masochistic kind of behaviour.

When she climaxed she threw down the crop, and at that moment, Victoria came into the room. How did he do?' she asked the girl.

'He will train on to become a good slave, said Phoebe. 'But he has a long way to go. He broke the rules before I gave him permission, so first he must go in the stocks.'

I was forced into the stocks and kept there for two hours before they came to me again. I was baffled but in a way excited at the rare and bizarre situation I found myself in.

It was Victoria who spoke next.

'I believe Phoebe has shown you what it's all about. Leaving aside the fact that you tried to take advantage of her, you were ready to take punishment for the pleasure you got. That is as it

should be. No man should ever enjoy a woman's body without paying the price. But Phoebe and I have decided that the man's enjoyment should always be secondary to the woman's enjoyment, and it should be simul­taneous with physical punishment. Panty worship leads to a man under­standing this for he knows that the maximum he can really ask from a woman is the substitute of the most intimate garment. Then when the woman wishes to enjoy herself, the man is permitted to pleasure her, but only if he can take the associated and appropriate punishment that goes with it.'

Now I began to see what it was all about.

'I am going to put you to the test myself now and you will be punished as you provide enjoyment for one of us,' said Victoria.

The thought that I might be able to do to Victoria what I had done to Phoebe excited me and I waited with bated breath for her to tell me what I had to do. But it was not Victoria to whom I should give the pleasure but Phoebe again who told me that I would now have to lick her panties at the back and make them so wet that she would feel it through the material. I was forced with my head against a bench and Victoria placed a kind of long strap under my chin, holding it so tight that my head was forced back into a horizontalposition. Then Phoebe stood with her bottom in front of me and Victoria, relaxing the strap, told me to go ahead. I began to lick Phoebe's panties, wetting them as quickly as I could. But every minute or so Victoria jerked my head back as if to warn me that it was all being done for Phoebe's pleasure, not mine.

In the end I was permitted to bring Phoebe off again for she eventually turned round and drew the panties from her crotch.

Then, at last, I was given my chance with Victoria.

'I want you to lick my crotch and tongue-fuck me,' she said. 'But the price will be a very heavy one. You will be put in the stocks as you perform your task, and Phoebe will beat you with astick. Are you ready for that?'

I gladly said that I was ready and a few moments later, fixed in the stocks, I began to lick and tongue Victoria's naked genitals, finally working my tongue deep into her vagina. As I did so Phoebe brought a long thin stick down across my back and buttocks, striking me with insistent regularity, the whole of my body eventually being covered with red stripes.

When it was over I knew that it had been worth it and that I was ready to suffer in this way for the privilege of satisfying Victoria. I wondered what the price would be if she ever wanted me to make love to her in a more normal way.